'Being with others who have experienced the same brings great comfort at this time of year’

Cheltenham

Venue: St Matthews Church in Cheltenham

Shares, Tewkesbury resident Sue Maizonnier, as she explains why anyone who is grieving might benefit from attending a special event organised by end of life and bereavement care charity, Sue Ryder this December.

The Celebrate a Life Gloucestershire event, hosted at St Matthews Church in Cheltenham and organised by the team at Sue Ryder Leckhampton Court Hospice, offers a safe space for people to come together and remember loved ones.

And Sue hopes that by sharing her experience she can encourage others to attend so they may experience the comfort she found after attending her first Sue Ryder remembrance event following the death of her mum, Jean Wheatley, from cancer in 2004.

“We were invited to the remembrance event, which was held in the hospice courtyard back then,” Sue shared. “We were still feeling so raw about losing mum but we agreed ‘let’s go’.

“And I am so glad we did as it really did help. We grieved for Mum; we felt sad and that was ok; but we also celebrated her life and this allowed us to start to move on and enjoy Christmas (and our first Christmas without her) with our young children. Just as Mum would have wanted. This was so very helpful to us and it continued to be a tradition for our family for a number of years.”

“Being there with other people who are remembering someone special, being with others who have experienced the same things as you, brings much comfort especially at this time of year.”

“It is really heartwarming to see how the event gives comfort to others, no matter what stage of the grieving process they are at. Some come alone, some as families or with friends. Everyone is welcomed the minute they walk through the door. There is an area at the back, where there are activities for children, so families can attend together. There are staff and volunteers to offer comfort to those who need it. Everyone is catered for. After the service there’s a chance to chat to staff we haven’t seen for a while over a cuppa with cake and mince pies.

“And it is truly magical moment when messages of remembrance and love are put on the softly lit wall of lights.”
Over the years as her family grew, Sue found she didn’t always have the time to attend the Sue Ryder remembrance event.

However, after a few years away Sue was asked if she could volunteer at the event, and with her sister Linda by her side, the pair have become regular volunteers at the special service to meet and greet families.

“We know what it is like. We have been there, so we can empathise with families who come through the door,” she said. “We still go and remember Mum on that day. We remember and we celebrate and then we move on to celebrating this time of year with our friends and families, just as Mum would have wanted.”

By sharing her experience, Sue hopes she can encourage people to return to the event if they haven’t been for a number of years too.

“Even if you dip in and out for a few years, or whether it is your second, fifth, tenth or fifteenth anniversary of losing someone, this special remembrance event is still there for you to go back to, and the team at Sue Ryder are always there for you too.”
“Now, my sister and I not only attend to share together memories of our dear Mum, Jean, but it has become our chance to come together in memory of our Dad, Peter, who has since died as well”
Sue is keen to make sure people know you don’t have to have had any previous contact with or had a loved one cared for by Sue Ryder to attend either.
“Sue Ryder Celebrate a Life provides a relaxed and safe space to be, and it is a good environment to bring back memories and simply celebrate the life of our loved ones”
“If you’re grieving or want to remember someone close to you at this time of year and you have never experienced Sue Ryder Celebrate a Life, please come and join us. It is a safe haven with a gentle atmosphere and refreshments available afterwards. Everyone is welcome and it’s ok to shed a tear.”

Sue Ryder Celebrate a Life Gloucestershire takes place on Wednesday 11 December at 6.30pm for a 7pm start at St Matthews Church, Clarance Street, Cheltenham.

 The event is free to attend and is open to anyone who wishes to remember someone important, regardless of when they died and if they were a patient of Sue Ryder. Featuring readings, songs and live music performances, guests are also invited to write a personal dedication to remember and appreciate the life of someone special, which will be displayed at the event.     

Limited spaces are available. For more information and to register to attend visit www.sueryder.org/Remember or contact the Sue Ryder Leckhampton Court Hospice Fundraising Team via email leckhampton.fundraising@sueryder.org or call 01242 246270. Sue Ryder offers a range of free grief support at sueryder.org/grief  

 

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